FANTASY BASEBALL: HOOTS & HOLLERS

FATHERS’ DAY WISH LIST:

Hey, Chazz! Can ya help me out with these fantasy baseball fathers' Day gifts?

I was never lucky enough to have kids of my own, but it is Fathers’ Day but I do have a dog, so I am making this Fantasy Wish List for Fathers’ Day. I’m sure that my pup Chazz can’t make this happen, but what the heck… I’m filling space here. Nonetheless, this is what I would want if I could have anything fantasy-related for this greeting card-created holiday which I don’t get to participate in.

For openers, it would make me a happier person if people didn’t tell me I had to take Troy Tulowitzki because he fell to me so far into the second round. There is a reason he fell that far and that reason is now evident as he will miss the next six weeks with a broken bone- injury plagued pain in my butt… I really want one healthy full week of Nelson Cruz. He is.327/10/34/7 SB in just 32 games this season. Imagine the numbers if he had played in fifty games so far…Somebody please fix Dan Haren. The guy is an awesome pitcher every season, yet because of some feeling deep within, I avoid him every season. This campaign, I take him and come to realize my intuition must be pretty damn decent… Since I am asking for the unfathomable anyway, I really hope somebody can keep Jimmy Rollins healthy for the rest of the fantasy year. His injury has totally killed one of my teams. At least make it through a couple straight weeks, buddy- GEEZ… oh! And can somebody see to it that Stephen Strasburg gets more than 100 innings this year? They’re getting used up mighty quick… It would be totally selfish if I didn’t add something for someone else to my wish list.  Is there anyone out there who can  give some peace and contentment to the city of Chicago, White Sox and cubs players, and  their fantasy owners by seeing to it that Sox manager Ozzie Guillen and Cubs skipper Lou Piniella finally get the ax. They are not only mis-managing their teams, but are doing nothing for the morale of their players and those of us who own them in fantasy scenarios… BUT what I really, really, really want is for someone to make a one-sided, stupid trade with me in every league I am in, to make me a multi-league champion this season…

RIPE FOR THE PICKIN’:

Niese is not only nice the Mets, but could be a good pickup for you, too...

Pedro Alvarez is the Pirates’ new prospect to play in the MLB and worth a look. He hit in the .280s at Triple-A with a homer about every 18 ABs. The hot corner prospect hasn’t lit it up yet in his four games, but is worth a flier, especially in keeper leagues… Jonathan Niese is making a big splash in New York for the Mets, his latest gem being a one-hitter vs. the Padres. He is definitely worth a look, especially in a two-start week ahead… Beat writers in DC and Baltimore are saying great things about Orioles rookie Jake Arietta and rightly so. He has 2 wins and 9 Ks in 13 IP in two starts so far. With an ERA of 2.77 and a WHIP 0f 1.00, he is getting a lot of looks, even though he plays for the hapless Baltimore team… Dayan Viciedo is another hot prospect who is up, making his debut today for the White Sox. With little output for the Sox and third this season from Mark Teahen, the team is ready to give the power-hitting Cuban-native a go, with little concern of his strikeout issues. .290/14//34 in the minors sounds muy caliente to me…

INJURY WATCH:

Before setting your lineup for week twelve, check and re-check the status on the following players: Carlos Gonzalez (knee), Alex Rodriguez (hip), Hanley Ramirez (hamstring), JD Drew (leg), Erick Aybar (knee), Jorge Posada (foot), and Austin Jackson (back).

DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE:

Two-start pitchers for the week ahead:

Use ‘em:

Roy Oswalt is still in Houston and is a must-start, pitching like the ace he is!

T Hanson, Atl

J Lester, Bos

J Danks, ChWS

J Verlander, Det

R Oswalt, Hou

AJ Burnett, NYY

T Lincecum, SF

Steady and Willing:

R Dempster, ChC

M Leake, Cin

E Santana, LAA

C Kershaw, LAD

S Baker, Min

J Niese, NYM

M Latos, SD

J Garcia, StL

B Cecil, Tor

L Hernandez, Wsh

Only if you have to, but take an antacid first:

J Chacin, Col

A Sanchez, Fla

B Chen, KC

G Gonzalez, Oak

J Moyer, Phi

J Vargas, Sea

T Hunter, TX

♫ ♫ ♫ ♫ You’ll be sorrrryyyyy ♫ ♫ ♫ ♫:

R Lopez, AZ

J Guthrie, Balt

M Talbot, Cle

C Narvenson, Mlw

R Ohlendorf, Pit

W Davis, TB

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