CAPTAIN AMERICA Available To Watch Online!
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Jan 4 2010, 8:01 PM
I remember about twenty years ago, I was scouting the shelves of the local video store looking for a worthy VHS to rent for the night (in fact, I recall it being hotter than Diane Lane’s undergarments that night, so was probably looking for a couple of movies) – it’s then that I spotted Captain America (the movie, not a guy in tights crouching in the store’s kiddie playground).
Hadn’t heard much about the film, but knew enough about the comic. Being that the internet wasn’t around then, and the latest issue of Premiere in the newsagent was twelve months old, I wasn’t aware the film was the butt of jokes in Hollywood at the time. It became an immediate contender (Hell, it had me at ‘Superhero movie with ‘Bogomil from Beverly Hills Cop’!).
Unfortunately for Steve Rogers, Edgar Frog then turned up.
I spotted Rock N’ Roll High school Forever – a straight-to-video sequel (starring Corey Feldman) to the 70s classic on a shelf opposite the one adorning the lone copy of Captain America.
Don’t quite know what worked in its favour – maybe its classification advertised ‘nudity’ within? – But it get my three bucks that night. And, if I recall correctly, The Rachel Papers (that very-randy Ione Skye/Dexter Fletcher flick) scored the rest of the coins in my A-Team wallet.
Alas, I didn’t see Captain America until a few years later (was likely ‘out’ when I returned to the video store the following week).
But I needn’t have bothered at all.
What a shocker this was! Cardboard sets, read-and-gaze acting (not even Ronny ‘Bogomil’ Cox was worthwhile!), hack plotting, and special effects that had ostensibly been produced on a cordial-stained – wasn’t everybody’s?! - Vic 20.
No wonder the VHS never came with a ‘highly recommended’ sticker (like so many did back in the day; heck, one of my first jobs, when I first worked at a video store, was to apply those stickers to movies I thought worthy of them. Feel really bad for the chap who hired Once Bitten with Lauren Hutton!) Or a ‘if you’re not satisfied with this film...your money back!’ guarantee. It was atrocious. Likely, the worst Marvel movie ever made (Roger Corman’s Fantastic Four movie was worse, but it didn’t officially get a release).
Matt ‘son of J.D’ Salinger plays Steve Ross/Captain America in the flick. Rogers volunteers for a top secret government program that would chemically turn him into a super-soldier. Once fully transformed, he’s assigned the task of thwarting master-meanie ‘Red Skull’.
Cox plays the kindly U.S President, and Ned Beatty (of Superman fame) is Roger’s portly buddy.
And there’s a moment near the second art that the second goes black.... oh wait! No, that wasn’t the film... that was my eyelids going in for the close.
Much like the feature film adaptation of The Punisher (1989), Captain America was originally scheduled for a theatrical release, but instead gathered dust before eventually been released straight to, well, our large-ish JVC video machines (though they’ve got nothing on my BETA machine!).
With the VHS rather hard to find these days, and the film still not available on DVD (will likely be released when the upcoming Joe Johnston-directed version hits theaters), Hulu has kindly uploaded the film to their servers for us to enjoy... for free!
Sorry, did I just say enjoy!?
‘Watch with curiosity’ might be a better way to put it.
I remember about twenty years ago, I was scouting the shelves of the local video store looking for a worthy VHS to rent for the night (in fact, I recall it being hotter than Diane Lane’s undergarments that night, so was probably looking for a couple of movies) – it’s then that I spotted Captain America (the movie, not a guy in tights crouching in the store’s kiddie playground). Hadn’t heard much about the film, but knew enough about the comic. Being that the internet wasn’t around then, and the latest issue of Premiere in the newsagent was twelve months old, I wasn’t aware the film was the butt of jokes in Hollywood at the time. It became an immediate contender (Hell, it had me at ‘Superhero movie with ‘Bogomil from Beverly Hills Cop’!).
Unfortunately for Steve Rogers, Edgar Frog then turned up.
I spotted Rock N’ Roll High school Forever – a straight-to-video sequel (starring Corey Feldman) to the 70s classic on a shelf opposite the one adorning the lone copy of Captain America. Don’t quite know what worked in its favour – maybe its classification advertised ‘nudity’ within? – But it get my three bucks that night. And, if I recall correctly, The Rachel Papers (that very-randy Ione Skye/Dexter Fletcher flick) scored the rest of the coins in my A-Team wallet. Alas, I didn’t see Captain America until a few years later (was likely ‘out’ when I returned to the video store the following week).
But I needn’t have bothered at all.
What a shocker this was! Cardboard sets, read-and-gaze acting (not even Ronny ‘Bogomil’ Cox was worthwhile!), hack plotting, and special effects that had ostensibly been produced on a cordial-stained – wasn’t everybody’s?! - Vic 20. No wonder the VHS never came with a ‘highly recommended’ sticker (like so many did back in the day; heck, one of my first jobs, when I first worked at a video store, was to apply those stickers to movies I thought worthy of them. Feel really bad for the chap who hired Once Bitten with Lauren Hutton!) Or a ‘if you’re not satisfied with this film...your money back!’ guarantee. It was atrocious. Likely, the worst Marvel movie ever made (Roger Corman’s Fantastic Four movie was worse, but it didn’t officially get a release).
Matt ‘son of J.D’ Salinger plays Steve Ross/Captain America in the flick. Rogers volunteers for a top secret government program that would chemically turn him into a super-soldier. Once fully transformed, he’s assigned the task of thwarting master-meanie ‘Red Skull’. Cox plays the kindly U.S President, and Ned Beatty (of Superman fame) is Roger’s portly buddy. And there’s a moment near the second art that the second goes black.... oh wait! No, that wasn’t the film... that was my eyelids going in for the close.
Much like the feature film adaptation of The Punisher (1989), Captain America was originally scheduled for a theatrical release, but instead gathered dust before eventually been released straight to, well, our large-ish JVC video machines (though they’ve got nothing on my BETA machine!).
With the VHS rather hard to find these days, and the film still not available on DVD (will likely be released when the upcoming Joe Johnston-directed version hits theaters), Hulu has kindly uploaded the film to their servers for us to enjoy... for free!
Sorry, did I just say enjoy!?
‘Watch with curiosity’ might be a better way to put it.
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